If you’re experiencing domestic violence, there are resources available:
DVConnect womensline: 1800 811 811
DVConnect mensline: 1800 600 636
1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732
If you’re in immediate danger, contact the police on 000.
Domestic and family violence (see what is domestic violence) can extend beyond physical violence in intimate relationships. An insidious form of violence that often flies under the radar is controlling or coercive behaviour and economic abuse. Our checklist shows the key factors to look out for to help parties determine if they’re experiencing it in their own lives.
Key takeaways
- Coercive control involves issues such as constant monitoring, humiliation, and isolation.
- Financial abuse can include restricting access to money and monitoring purchases.
- Our checklist covers common signs of coercive control and financial abuse.
- There are steps you can take if you believe your partner is coercive or financially abusive.
- A family lawyer can help explain your options and how your situation may affect future proceedings.
Why this coercive control checklist exists now
The Family Law Amendment Act 2024 introduced family law reforms to better recognise economic or financial abuse as family violence. The changes apply to proceedings instituted from 10 June 2025, and to some earlier proceedings not yet finally determined. However, these behaviours can be difficult to identify and prove. Knowing how these elements of domestic abuse manifest is important so you can understand whether they’re relevant to your circumstances and what to do next.
Coercive control and the law in Queensland
Queensland criminalised coercive control from 26 May 2025. The offence applies where a person engages in a course of conduct consisting of domestic violence on more than one occasion, intending to coerce or control the other person, and the conduct would reasonably be likely to cause harm. The maximum penalty is 14 years imprisonment.
Family law treats coercive control separately. In family law matters, coercive control and economic abuse can be relevant to parenting and property proceedings. Read more on how section 102NA of the Family Law Act supports domestic violence victims.
Signs of coercive control
Coercive control is often a pattern of behaviour over time. A pattern is not a requirement for behaviour to be family violence under the Family Law Act, but it is often relevant to the evidence. Controlling behaviour can cover a lot of different situations. Here are some common ways a partner can display it:
Routinely telling you when you’re allowed to leave the house and who you can socialise with.
Preventing you from accessing support services, including medical services.
Repeatedly putting you down with humiliating and demeaning language.
Trying to isolate you from your friends and family members.
Making you feel like you always need to tiptoe around them to avoid arousing their anger.
Monitoring where you are and who you’re with at all times.
Signs of financial abuse specifically
Financial abuse overlaps with coercive control significantly, with the warning signs generally revolving around financial issues. Some things to look out for in your partner’s behaviour include:
Interfering with your ability to pursue education and get a job.
Using your financial dependence to keep you in the relationship.
Restricting your access to bank accounts or financial information, including your own money.
Monitoring your expenses and forcing you to justify ordinary purchases.
Controlling how household finances are managed and not giving you a say.
The checklist
Here’s a practical checklist to determine whether you may be facing controlling behaviour from your partner. This isn’t an exhaustive list, but you can use it as a first step towards understanding your position and deciding on the help that you need.
Do any of these points sound familiar?
Coercive control red flags
Insisting on having your mobile phone’s PIN so they can look through your text messages and search history at will.
Threatening to self-harm as a way to force you into complying with their wishes.
Attacking your self-esteem through constant insults and demeaning language.
Limiting access to social media or other online communication tools.
Manipulating you with behaviour like the silent treatment.
Giving you excessive affection after subjecting you to emotional abuse.
Starting arguments when you try to visit family or friends.
Financial abuse red flags
Changing the PIN on a bank account and refusing to share it with you.
Requiring you to ask for money every time you want to buy something, no matter how small.
Creating accounts or accruing debts in your name without your knowledge.
Threatening to leave you without money or access to housing.
Hiding assets and financial information from you.
Forcing you to sign loan documents or other financial agreements against your will.
Causing disruptions at your workplace to make it difficult for you to maintain employment.
Some general questions to ask yourself
Has the behaviour gotten more frequent as time has gone on?
Are you feeling increasingly isolated?
Has your partner’s actions made you more dependent on them?
Do you feel that you’re not able to make decisions for yourself?
What to do if this checklist sounds familiar
Demonstrating economic or financial abuse can be difficult because evidence of a pattern of behaviour is often relevant. One of the primary challenges is that the law wants to differentiate a genuinely abusive relationship from the normal difficulties that partners can face with each other.
Your partner may try to justify any single incident in isolation. The police and the Court consider the evidence of what has happened, and behaviour over time is often relevant. Here are some practical steps you can take if this checklist resonates with you.
Prioritise your and your family’s immediate safety. If you’re in danger, call the police on 000. If you’re not, consider whether you are able to confront your partner about their behaviour. They may not be aware of how their actions are impacting you. If you have any doubts, get support first.
Talk to a family member, trusted friend, or support worker for assistance. Isolation can be a major component of psychological abuse. Speaking with someone who will understand your situation can help.
Gather evidence and documentation if it’s safe to do so. Don’t put yourself at risk if your partner is keeping an eye on your technology use. Depending on your situation, this may include:
Maintaining a document with details of individual incidents along with the date they occurred.
Keeping copies of threatening or abusive messages and emails.
Evidence of debts or accounts created in your name without your permission.
Photographs of any damaged property.
Make a safety plan. If you plan on leaving your relationship, it’s important to have a support system you can rely on. Your plan should reflect your circumstances, but may include:
Contacting family or friends to arrange alternative accommodation if you decide to leave. If you’re worried about your partner knowing where you are, looking at available domestic violence shelters can help.
Thinking about how you can access money. You might withdraw money or transfer it to a separate account that your partner doesn’t know about. If you can’t access money, a trusted third party may be willing to give you temporary financial support.
Organising transport. You may not have access to a vehicle. See if a friend or family member can pick you up from a safe location.
Keeping copies of important documentation with someone you trust. This can be important if your partner decides to start destroying potential evidence.
Getting a prepaid mobile phone with emergency contacts, if you can.
Getting support and legal advice
Suffering psychological or physical abuse can cause significant mental health issues. But you don’t need to deal with it alone. You can access support, even if you’re not ready to leave the relationship or take legal action yet.
A family lawyer can help you understand how your situation may affect future proceedings, like parenting and financial arrangements. Financial abuse can have particularly important implications for property settlements. They can also walk you through your options to help you decide what steps you’re comfortable with.
It can be important to take legal action early if your partner is taking actions, such as:
Building up significant liabilities in your name.
Threatening to relocate interstate or overseas with your children.
Transferring or wasting money and other assets to avoid a property settlement.
Are you experiencing controlling or coercive behaviour?
Speak with a domestic violence lawyer on the Sunshine Coast at Ferrall and Co. about coercion and economic abuse. Contact us today for a free and confidential consultation.
Disclaimer: This article provides general information only. It is not legal advice. Family law outcomes depend on your circumstances. You should speak with a family lawyer before making decisions about your matter.
